I read an article today that did a survey of over 1000 women in a relationship, half of whom had a fall back guy that they would go to when they break it off with their current significant other. If they're married they are even more likely to have someone on the side. This 'other' could be an old friend, an ex-boyfriend, ex-husband, a colleague or someone who they have met at the gym or a club. That means it pretty much could be anyone.
I kind of figured this to be the case just by observing those around me in relationships that failed and even my own failed marriage. If they don't already have someone they will surely find someone before they break it off with their current other. To me this says that at least half of the women out there are incapable of committing to a relationship.You can't really make a relationship work if you go into it with one foot out the door already. Relationships should be a commitment 100% in or out. This is especially true for a marriage. A marriage is a total commitment to your significant other, for better or for worse, right?
I'd like to see a study done on the men out there to get some perspective. I've seen many breakups through my years but I have never met a man who was in a relationship and had some woman on the side waiting. I think if that were the case the man would probably cheat and that would be in a whole other class. Four out of ten of these women in the survey said they met this other person while they were with their partner. Women are known to have an easier time emotionally during a breakup. A large part of that is because they walk right out of one relationship right into the arms of another man. They were probably processing the demise of the relationship well before they actually broke it off as well. She could have been thinking about breaking it off for months or even years. Slowly adjusting herself to it. This certainly would make a breakup easier but as I stressed above, it's impossible to commit to a relationship while keeping someone on the side lines. That person would always be on there mind and they would always be comparing the two.
About half of all marriages these days end in divorce. Look at the mindset of people today and you'll see why. Those vows taken while getting married were put there for a reason. If people would just be honest during the vows and commit themselves to living by those vows the divorce rate would drop considerably. If you don't mean it, don't say it. Pretty simple. The time spent dating and the engagement period are the place to weed through your insecurities. Not during your marriage. Wise up people.